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Die Chibi Die! =)

The above image is a lovely portrayal of CURE's November attack on the sugary demonspawn who are the members of Project CUTE! BWAHAH!

The following is Project CUTE's version of what happened, included with the gracious permission of our mortal enemy, Jordan Sabourin. ;)

Keep in mind - this is the enemy's version!!

Project C.U.T.E. November Update
Nov. 2, 1996

CRASH! CURE's first strike!
I will not forgive them!!

Like my cheesy anime-style title? Anyway, last night me and a few other Project C.U.T.E. members were at Club Anime (Ottawa University's Anime Club, which plays every kind of anime and is a basic hangout on Friday nights) when Curtis (notorious Project cure member) decided we would make his devotion known by......burning a helpless Chibi-Usa card. It was a SMS card, and he had offered to sell it to me last week; only my stinginess stopped me from buying it.

I had to think quick. I assembled as many Project C.U.T.E. members as I could and followed them outside. Our strike force stood poised; we had to let them make the first move. Curtis took out the card. I made a grab for it. Carlen tried to intercept, but I tossed her aside like yesterday's newspaper. Then, Curtis made a break for it! Lenny Wu was in the lead after Curtis, I followed up behind, and I'm not sure who was behind me. We sprinted faster then the speed of light, but Curtis was fast. He made it all the way around the building to the parking lot. I had him around a car. It was a stalemate. Just then, I saw Travis run by me. "Over here!" I shouted. Soon everyone else caught up. Lenny was on the ground panting. We had reassembled and were back where we started.

Then, Curtis tried to make the hand-off to Rick Miller. Hieder and someone else tried to get the card from him, and I took on Rick Miller. We didn't know who had the card!?! Curtis made a run for it again, and I pinned Rick to the ground. I had a sneaking suspicion Curtis's run was a fake, and Rick really had the card. I kept him pinned to the cement for a while, and then decided I would be nice and let him breathe. I started walking towards Curtis, while keeping an eye on Rick. I turned around and looked at him, and he gave himself away. I ran towards him, and he took off.

I had to catch a bus, so I tried to send other PCute members after them. I thought I was safe for a moment because nobody had lighter (duh). Rick disappeared. My body with an amazing delayed reaction time of about 15 minutes, realized it didn't like me sprinting after getting negligible exercise for the last three or four months. My ribs wanted to burst out of my chest and my throa became the size of a pinhole. I went inside to get a drink. When came out I saw my group leaving for Rideau. I didn't know where Rick was, and I didn't have the time or ability to find him.

As I was about to leave, Jen Byrne (neutral) broke the news to me; Rick had burned the card! On cue, Rick comes to show me his proud accomplishment. The card was barely recognisable. I snatched the corpse from him, shredded it, and scattered it before he could terrorize other PCute members with it.

Thus ends the report of Project CUTE. Yes, that's right...not only did we burn a Chibi-card, the president of CUTE himself proceeded to help us in our efforts of destruction! ;)

A shredded corner of the card remains...Curtis Ireland, loyal CURE member, has been appointed Keeper of the Trophy.

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